How to Date Intentionally and Find and Keep Healthy Love

Dating can be a daunting task, especially in today's world of online dating and social media. It can be hard to know where to start, and it's easy to get discouraged when you don't find what you're looking for right away. But if you're willing to put in the initial work, dating intentionally can help you find (and keep) a healthy, satisfying, fulfilling, and lasting relationship.

What is intentional dating?

Intentional dating is the practice of dating with a purpose. It's about taking the time to get to know yourself and what you're looking for in a partner, and then setting out to find someone who shares your values and goals.

Why is intentional dating important?

There are a few reasons why intentional dating is important. First, it can help you avoid the pitfalls of casual dating. When you date intentionally, you're not just looking for someone to have fun with. You're looking for someone who you can build a life with.

Second, intentional dating can help you find a healthier relationship. When you know what you're looking for, you're less likely to settle for someone who isn't a good fit for you. You're also more likely to be upfront about your needs and expectations, which can help prevent conflict and misunderstandings down the road.

How can I date more intentionally?

• Become aware of your patterns. If there are repeated patterns that are coming up, it's helpful to look back a little bit further and maybe explore what kind of relationship your parents have. What did you see modeled in your home growing up? What kind of relationship do you have with your mom or your dad? Even if it is an automatic response to want to repeat some of these patterns the awareness can create a little bit of a pause and that's where we can create change. We can say to ourselves, “ it might feel good in the moment, but afterward I'm not really feeling great.

• Take some time to get to know yourself. What do you like? What makes you happy? What are the things that you value in your life? What kind of partner do you want to be? Do you want to have children?

  Develop Self-Soothing Skills. It’s helpful to learn to tolerate some uncomfortable feelings that come up during the dating process. It’s also important to explore ways to enjoy being with yourself.

• Be mindful when you're on dates. Take time to just notice how you are feeling on the date when you first. Ask yourself: “Am I enjoying?” "Would I like to go out with this person again?” It’s a balance of being present and allowing yourself to be in the process, while also keeping your values and goals in mind.

  If you need a little more help dating intentionally, let’s chat! Book a free call and get started today!